Giving Up Expectations

 It is amazing how what applies to our adoption is relatable to ALL during this season. And so, I've titled this blog 'Giving Up Expectations.'

When we chose to adopt again, we actually didn't immediately pick Thailand. We thought that would be the easy decision because we knew the program, we knew they'd find great homes for these kids - should we go somewhere else that has greater need? As we prayed and sought the Lord, He confirmed how we could bring Him most glory and have the greatest impact on our children was by giving them the same birth home country. We could focus on showing them that culture, why it is so special, and they would have each other to encourage throughout life having many of the same experiences.

So, took a deep breathe - we got this...we know what we are doing because we've done it before.

Well, needless to say, God shakes that attitude off you pretty quick bringing you back into reality.

This adoption our dossier got lost early on, that was new. We pursued a waiting child (which we had never done before) and we were convinced we were fully qualified to parent that child. Well, after an emotionally taxing process, we weren't the best fit. Giving up a child you viewed as 'possibly' yours for several weeks was hard! We get matched last July, now seeing through God's eyes how perfect of a fit our daughter was for our family. I mentally start planning our trip, with a First Approval in March and us traveling say in June. We've done this before, so I had our trip mapped out ready to book once we got approved.

Now, there is wisdom in planning ahead and preparing for things. But if COVID has taught us anything, it is nail down what is MOST important and on all the rest, give up your expectations. You are not in control!

Experience doesn't always make you most qualified. Willingness and trusting in the One who is in control does. In adoption, and almost everything else!

We are preparing ourselves that we don't know when to expect First Approval, but that doesn't mean we stop praying.

We are preparing ourselves that when we travel will certainly not be even close to the month we expected, and that's ok. Because what's most important for each of our family members is to be united when God says it's best for us. And for our daughter to be loved on by her sweet foster family just a bit longer.

We are preparing ourselves that our trip may look completely different than our first adoption. We were planning to visit our favorite park in Bangkok, a trip to beach to meet up with friends who now are not even in Asia, floating market fun and plenty of time in the pool. Now we are mindful we may be some of the first jumping on an international flight and the atmosphere may be harder on kids traveling. We may have to quarantine when we arrive, and I'm sure when we come home. When our daughter firsts see us, she may not see our smile behind a mask, just tears streaming down our eyes. We may never get to the beach and may live in a hotel room in Bangkok for weeks.

But ya know what, MOST important is getting our girl in God's timing. So, our expectations are laid down and we are resting in the One who is orchestrating details to bring us together.

So as everything you expected to happen this spring - a gymnasium filled graduation, a church filled wedding, a family vacation of a lifetime, a funeral service to lay your most treasured people, camps, normal school life, a job...so much of these days are out of our control, and it's ok to be discouraged by that. Absolutely! BUT, evaluate what's MOST important to you, and be OK if that's all the Lord brings to you. Contentment is medicine for our souls, and trusting in what God is doing is life saving.