Two Month Mark - New Experiences
November 15, 2016. That's the two month mark of having Dominick home.Wow, I can hardly believe it. It is incredible to see before my eyes how natural our little family of three has become. No notice that our skin is different color (although I do notice how lovely his is as mine turns more pale entering the colder months), no notice that we have different backgrounds, and no notice that our nationality is different. Instead we are united because we are family, choosing to love. We make memories together, learn each other so we see how best to compliment each other, love each other no matter what, and each play a part in making our family what it is. It's neat to think about how strong love can be...having the same DNA is not required. Certainly Jason and I are not from the same blood, each of our pets are family, and now Dominick fits right into that pattern of adopted into our family structure. God gives us the greatest and best example of that in how He invites us into His family, adopted into the family of God from all skin colors, backgrounds and nationalities!
Having a front row seat seeing Dominick experience life with us is so much fun, such a privilege to be training him up and so much joy to see fruit and results in his progress that I can only credit God's hands for in His life. I'm continually moved every time we pray to see him point to God before we pray, and how he squeezes his eyes shut (for the first few seconds) as we pray and talk to God together. One of his first two syllable words was 'Bible.' This was one reason we longed to adopt from Thailand, to tell this little boy about Jesus...who changed my life for eternity and I pray Dominick will understand this one day for himself.
In month number two, Dominick's experiences include:
- A Stephens family tradition, The Covered Bridge Festival in Parke County, Indiana
- One of the warmest Indiana falls which I'm thinking is God's grace to a little boy from southeast Asia not used to temperatures below 75
- Bonfires in the backyard
- Family Photo Sessions
- His official international adoption medical appointment, that went great!
- Halloween! And Trick-or-Treating
- Taking all his fuzzy siblings to their annual vet appointment
- Going to Michigan, and meeting his great-grandparents
- Voting in the 2016 Election (at 6AM in the morning to avoid long lines)
- Meeting many new friends (to him) and family
- His first Orphan Sunday at church (and his Thai flag hung in the lobby which he loved)
- His first concert, Josh Turner
As we now enter our third month home with Dominick, we could not be more grateful to God for giving us this opportunity. It is such a blessing and joy to be on this ride. In the next week, we officially step into the Post-Placement process in Dominick being with us, with the desire and prayer that he becomes a Stephens in 2017. Please join us in prayer as God continues to move, and we enter this new phase of our adoption journey. We are so blessed by having many on this adoption ride with us!
Rachel, I'd love to hear more details from you as my husband and I are starting the process to adopt a toddler from Thailand, from Ireland. We are partway through the assessment but have been talking a lot with our social worker about the bonding period and how much "cocooning" will be needed with keeping things quiet at first and not involving too many other friends or family members. I wondered how you found this has been going with Dominick. I am naturally sociable and love to be around my family, so I'm a little unsure about how much we should stay at home and how much to include others in our family circle. I would so appreciate it if you'd let me know how things have been working so far for you!
ReplyDeleteHi Sarah! Wow, for starters I would love to know how you found my blog all the way from Ireland? So cool. I would really say it depends on the child. We learned quickly his personality (and actually could already tell a lot about his personality from reports from Thailand) that he was cautious of strangers. We've learned him fast seeing he can handle situations best when taking slow and steady, and with as much routine or familiarity as possible. So we have been blessed by gaining his trust from the start, and as long as we are the 'steady and always there' guiding him through each situation, he has adjusted so well. It's helped that he isn't a fan of new people, so there is rarely even the option he'd hug or let someone else hold him, and if he does, it's because we've confirmed in him that it's ok (i.e. grandparents). Once we've helped him trust the new person, he does great with them. We went to church our first week home, had to go to the grocery store, etc. so didn't completely cocoon, but didn't engage in much outside of our normal and he loves to be held, so in all those situations, we were stuck like glue so he handled them well. I would suspect if you have an extroverted child that goes to everyone, you may have to cocoon more so they rely on just you. Or if you child that has a hard time with you at first, you need to be home in a safe place to build that trust. Your job even now is to know your child best, then it'll be natural for you to know what's best for them, and what they need might not be a cut-and-dry solution but a combo of various things. God gives us the greatest example of what a relationship looks like, and that's really what you are doing with your child - building a strong relationship for love, trust, joy, growth, etc. And last thing I'd say, it's for you and your husband to figure it out together. Many may want to speak into it, but ultimately, you will be their parents, and it's you guys together growing in learning the parenting thing side by side. Hope this helps! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Rachel! I would love to stay in touch with you by email or Facebook if you don't mind? My email is jsriche@gmail.com and my Facebook profile is Sarah Riche. I have been trawling the web looking for blogs of people, especially Christians, who have adopted or are in the process of adopting from Thailand - and I found yours! :)
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